Dragon's Bride
by jezabel1971
Summary: Continuation of Dragon Senses. Lucy and Natsu are together but Lucy is reluctant to take their relationship much further. An attempt at a realistic story of a developing relationship. Rating for future chapters. Not abandoned but it is on hiatus.
1. Chapter 1

Author's Notes:

So, here is the first chapter of the continuation of Dragon Senses. This is a direct continuation, so if you haven't read that story, you might be a little lost in this one. Also, like Dragon Senses, this story will include **massive spoilers for everything up to and including the Grand Magic Games.** I'm going to put more author's notes at the bottom of this, since most people are going to be too impatient to read much at the beginning. They will be in two parts, one talking about the story and the second a more personal note about some things going on in my life. Feel free to skip both, of course, but you might want to read the story bit, at least, since I'll be talking about the direction this story is going to take. The story as a whole will be rated M but this chapter is just a K+, maybe borderline T.

Of course, the characters and all belong to Hiro Mashima, not me.

Chapter 1

Lucy moved silently around her apartment, absentmindedly cleaning and straightening things up as she went. She was currently alone, something that had become rather rare since she and Natsu had started dating. They'd worked out an agreement, though, where at least twice a month, she'd spend the day at her home, working on her writing, while he and Happy went off to spend some time together, just the two of them. She was a little too restless to concentrate on her writing at the moment, so she'd decided to do some cleaning, instead. In a couple of days, she and Natsu would be celebrating their four-month anniversary as a couple and she was slightly preoccupied.

Normally, Lucy wouldn't think too much about an anniversary like this. She was not like Juvia, to literally count each day as an anniversary, and Natsu had never been the type to pay very much attention to things like birthdays or anniversaries. Their relationship was still new enough for it to be important to Lucy but not something that she would expect someone like Natsu to keep track of, much less want to celebrate. He had surprised her, however, by acknowledging both their second and third-month anniversaries, giving her a new set of cotton towels, supposedly to replace some he'd accidentally destroyed, and a leather wristband, to match the one he wore.

Thinking about it, Lucy giggled, amused and slightly exasperated. Natsu was trying very hard to keep track of how long they'd been together and giving her a monthly gift was his way of marking the time. Since he was so new to even the idea of being in a relationship, he'd had a little difficulty trying to figure out what to give her. Mirajane was the one who had realized that Lucy's presents had not only been given on the exact day of their monthly anniversary, but they also represented the types of gifts traditionally given on yearly anniversaries. Their female guildmates thought it was incredibly sweet and romantic and, honestly, so did Lucy. All of the girls in the guild were eagerly waiting to see what fruit or flower gift he'd come up with for the fourth month and what excuse he'd use to explain his reason for giving something to Lucy this time.

Lucy smiled wistfully as she moved around the living room, thinking back on everything that had happened over the last several months. After they'd acknowledged their feelings for one another, Lucy's relationship with Natsu had settled back down into something closely resembling the relationship that they'd had before she'd been confronted with the realities of Natsu's dragon senses. They kissed a lot and cuddled a lot more but, for the most part, nothing else had changed very much. After some consideration, she'd come to the conclusion that the two of them had already loved each other so much and been so close that there really hadn't been that much that needed to change for them to transition into being together as a couple, rather than just exceedingly close friends. There were a few minor things, like Lucy no longer wanting to go on dates with other men and Natsu openly expressing an interest in girls and romance, but only when it came to Lucy. He was also very reluctant to leave her side, a side effect of the incomplete claim, which was why negotiating for a time for them to separated had been necessary. Their friends had teased them mercilessly, but no one had really been surprised when they'd announced that they were together. In fact, the only major difference was the new physical intimacy between them. At least, that would be the only major difference if there actually WAS any physical intimacy between them. So far, they hadn't really done much of anything together other than kiss.

Lucy frowned as she thought about it. At first, she had been content with nothing but kisses and a few tentative caresses and Natsu had been very careful not to pressure her into anything she might be uncomfortable with. Of course, for both of them, sex was a really big deal. With the two of them both being virgins, their first time would have been important to them anyway, but with the whole claiming/bonding/mating thing added to it, Lucy had been more than a little nervous about taking that step.

Lucy snorted in disgust, annoyed with herself for being less than honest, especially in her own thoughts. Taking a break from her cleaning for a moment, she went and got a glass of water from the kitchen. After taking a long drink, downing half of the glass at once, she leaned back against the counter and stared down at the glass in her hands, gently swirling the water.

"Nervous?" Sighing heavily, she muttered, "No, I wasn't nervous. I was scared to death. Being with him like that would essentially be my wedding night." A wry grin crossed her lips. "Actually, having sex with him would BE the wedding." Sighing again, she drained the glass and set it on the counter before going back into the living room to continue with her household chores.

After four months in a relationship with Natsu, Lucy was a lot less shy about talking about such things, although they hadn't told anyone that sex, for them, would be similar to getting married, only without the divorce option. Between Natsu's borderline obsession with always touching her and the comments and "advice" they'd heard from the guild ever since they'd gotten together, she'd had no choice but to develop a slightly thicker skin when it came to physical intimacy. She'd been so easily flustered and embarrassed at first and Natsu's total lack of modesty hadn't helped at all. The first time they had started to make out, he had immediately stripped completely naked. She'd promptly freaked out and demanded that he put his clothes back on but, Natsu being Natsu, he'd just stood there arguing with her about it, still naked. Eventually, she'd gotten him to agree to at least keep his boxers on, until she was more comfortable with the changes in their relationship.

Since then, with one notable exception, they hadn't really made any progress towards becoming lovers. That fact actually seemed to bother Lucy a lot more than Natsu, especially lately. Natsu, on the other hand, had been much more bothered by the fact that ordinary human males, not having Natsu's heightened senses, hadn't seemed to be aware that Lucy now had a boyfriend and continued to ask her out on occasion. Since he hadn't actually claimed her yet, Natsu's instincts saw the men as rivals, trying to steal her away, and his possessiveness had caused some problems at first. He hadn't wanted to let her out of his sight, for any reason. Natsu had wanted a way to make it obvious that Lucy was already taken and the easiest solution, to him, was to put a ring on her finger. Lucy had woken up one morning, about a month after they'd gotten together, to find Natsu sitting beside her on the bed, holding her left hand and admiring the matching rings that he'd placed on both of their fingers.

Lucy had immediately yanked off the ring and started yelling, angry at him for breaking in yet again and but more so for putting the ring on her finger without any kind of proposal. It hadn't helped that it had been a wedding ring, not an engagement ring. She had taken that to mean that Natsu didn't see the need for an actual wedding and this had lead to their first major fight as a couple. Between Natsu's instinct-driven fear of losing her to another man and Lucy's fear that he wouldn't want to have a real wedding ceremony, it had been a big one.

After a month of seeing Natsu wrapped around Lucy as often as physically possible, it was immediately apparent to the entire guild that something was wrong when they'd refused to even speak to one another and it didn't take long for their friends to start meddling, trying to get them back together. Lucy and Natsu had both refused to give any details to anyone about the reason for their fight, no matter what they were threatened with, and the attempts to "help" had quickly focused more on trying to discover what had happened between them, rather than resolving the issue. To everyone's surprise, it was Lucy that eventually exploded at them, demanding that their guildmates stay out of it. She snickered slightly as she went into the bathroom to continue her cleaning, remembering the shocked looks on her friends' faces when she'd yelled at them. They were even more startled by Natsu supporting her, in spite of the disagreement, telling everyone that if he and Lucy were going to be successful as a couple, then they needed to figure out how to work things out on their own when they argued.

Eventually, of course, the two of them had made up. When they finally talked it out, she'd been taken aback to discover that Natsu had already considered them engaged. Slightly sheepish, she remembered the way he'd rolled his eyes at her, asking what she'd thought he'd meant when he'd said that they'd be together for the rest of their lives. He'd been very unhappy, unable to disagree, when she'd pointed out that deciding to be together, even if it was going to be forever, and having a wedding ceremony were two entirely different things and there was no reason for her to wear a ring yet. He'd been crestfallen when she told him that even if he offered her an engagement ring, they'd only been officially together for a month and she wasn't willing to become publicly engaged so soon.

After a great deal of discussion, consisting mostly of Lucy talking and a pouting Natsu refusing to go along with anything she suggested, they finally reached a compromise. Ever since the Grand Magic Games, the popularity of the Fairy Tail mages had gone through the roof and Sorcerer Magazine was always willing to interview the guild members, especially someone as well-known and popular as Natsu. Many of the men who had approached her had known who she was and that she and Natsu had only been partners, so they had ignored his presence beside her. The two of them would take advantage of their popularity to make the status of their relationship known to the general public and, after "a suitable time", they'd announce their engagement and Lucy could openly start planning their wedding.

It had taken Lucy over an hour to get Natsu to agree to wait a full six months before making the announcement. Natsu, with typical impatience, hadn't wanted to wait at all, much less another five months. It had taken everything Lucy could think of to convince him to wait so long but, in the end, the convincing argument had been surprisingly simple. She'd finally stopped trying to persuade him by talking about things like how it might affect their reputations and just told him how she really felt, that she needed the time. She'd never had a boyfriend before, much less been in such a serious relationship, and she needed some time to come to terms with everything. She needed time to be absolutely sure that a life-time with Natsu was what she truly wanted. His immediate, though still reluctant, capitulation had been a bit of a revelation for Lucy.

Having finally finished the chores around her apartment, Lucy sat down at her desk, idly rearranging some papers in front of her, thinking about that discussion and how it had made her feel. She knew that Natsu loved her, even though he'd never actually said the words. He made his feelings for her obvious with his actions on a regular basis, but this had been the first time that she'd realized just how important her happiness was to him. While she loved him, she'd initially had her doubts about the two of them being able to succeed as a couple. Natsu could be incredibly stubborn and childish and behavior that she had been able to shrug off or ignore when they were just close friends and partners wouldn't necessarily be okay after they started dating. They both needed to learn how to accommodate one another and compromise and that had been the first time that Natsu had proven that he would back off when they disagreed over something if it was truly important to her, even if he was completely against it.

She had been absolutely stunned when she had found out that, rather than being reluctant to have a wedding, he was incredibly eager to go through with the ceremony. That was the reason why he was currently keeping such close track of their monthly anniversaries, not wanting to wait a moment longer than he'd agreed to before at least putting an engagement ring on her finger. It had made sense, though, when he pointed out that, as a celestial mage, the wedding vows would bind her as permanently to him as his own instincts would bind him to her, once they'd made love for the first time. Natsu genuinely wanted them to be together for the rest of their lives and a wedding would mean that divorce wouldn't be an option for either of them any more.

She had been so very relieved to realize that they could actually work things out and reach an acceptable compromise when they argued and it assuaged the worst of her doubts. That, along with discovering that he was actually planning for them to be married, had made her fall in love with him all over again. Her heart had been filled with so much love for him in that moment that she'd pounced on him, kissing him with such passion that they'd both gotten carried away and almost made love that night. They'd both been completely naked and Natsu had been kissing his way down her body when Happy had barged in, wanting to see if they'd made up yet. Lucy knew, without a doubt, that if Happy had been just a few minutes later, Natsu would have joined his body to hers and there would have been no going back.

Lucy shivered and bit her lip, thinking of that night. His hands and mouth had felt so good on her body and, if Erza's books had any truth at all to them, then having Natsu inside her would have felt so much better. She wrapped her arms around herself, hugging herself tightly, and leaned back in the chair. She couldn't seem to stop thinking about the way it had felt when he touched her intimately and how much she had enjoyed the heat and weight of his body above hers. He was frequently going on about how HE belonged to HER just as much as she belonged to him and, recently, such comments made her itch to explore the body that he was so blatantly offering to her. Despite her desire for him, though, something was holding her back.

Initially, after the shock of being interrupted, she had been mortified by the way she had acted with him. She had made such embarrassing sounds and acted so wanton, completely different from her usual self. Natsu had realized almost immediately that they'd gone way too far and much too soon for her comfort and had almost been afraid to touch her, even platonically, until she'd lost her temper and snapped at him. After that, they'd both relaxed and gone back to just kissing and holding each other. The publication of the article announcing the change in their relationship and the subsequent reduction in the number of men approaching Lucy had also helped things to go back to normal. Still, that incident had happened almost three months ago now and they hadn't gotten anywhere near that far since.

There were actually several reasons for their lack of progress, most of them because of Lucy. In the beginning, when they'd first gotten together, she'd been afraid of the permanence that the act of having sex would mean for them. After being with Natsu for the last few months, she had become much more confident in their relationship and that had slowly stopped being an issue for her. Her eagerness to explore the formerly forbidden world of sex had grown along with that confidence and her current difficulty in focusing on other things reflected her increased interest. Her embarrassment over her own behavior and loss of control the night they'd almost made love, on the other hand, had almost immediately become another concern for her.

Natsu had figured out what was bothering her and eventually confronted her about it. He'd told her that she was being stupid for getting upset over something that was completely normal. The boasting over his "obvious" sexual prowess aside, he'd had a point when he'd stated that her reactions had been a way for him to tell when she enjoyed what he was doing and there was absolutely nothing wrong with that. Erza's books were really the only thing Lucy had to go by when it came to what could be considered "normal" for sex but they talked about getting "caught up in the moment" and "carried away". When he'd initially told her that, she'd thought at first that he might have been lying, just trying to reassure her, but she'd realized that he was probably telling the truth. Natsu had also told her during that conversation that knowing she wanted him as badly as he wanted her was a really good thing, too. Lucy's whole body heated up and she shifted restlessly in her chair, remembering the expression on his face when he'd told her that. He'd made it quite clear that he would be more than willing to pick up where they'd left off the night they'd been interrupted, as long as that's what she wanted, too.

That issue having been addressed, she hadn't completely gotten over her embarrassment, but she'd realized that she wouldn't care so much about such things in the heat of the moment and had tried not to dwell on it too much. In spite of having come to terms with all of that, there was something about what had happened between them that continued to bother her. When she focused her thoughts on Natsu and the idea of being with him, it was something she wanted, very very much. On the other hand, when she thought about the actual experience they'd had, the way he had made her feel, she was uneasy. She wanted to be with him but any time he tried to make a move beyond just kissing, even when she encouraged him to, she tensed up and couldn't relax. If she was honest, she was actually a bit fearful and Natsu wasn't about to continue anything when she was feeling like that.

The problem was that Lucy, herself, didn't really understand why she was acting the way she was. She couldn't find the words to describe what was wrong, even in her own head, and neither one of them had been able to come up with a solution. Natsu had been surprisingly patient, saying that they had plenty of time to figure it out, years if necessary, and it was more important that Lucy be truly ready for such a step before they went any further. Lucy, though, was getting frustrated and more than a little annoyed with herself. They'd already been friends and partners for so long and, by this time, she was certain that they'd be very happy together, so she no longer saw any reason for them to delay becoming lovers.

She groaned and relaxed even further in the chair, letting her head fall back as far as it could and closing her eyes. "It's my fault," she whispered. "I'm the one that keeps stopping anything from happening and I'm more unhappy about it than he is. I just don't know what to do..."

"Maybe you should talk to someone about it, instead of keeping it all bottled up inside," came the unexpected response.

tbc...

Alright, about the story. This WILL have sex in it. The focus, though, is not on them getting it on, but a realistic exploration of the development of a relationship. Lucy lives in a place and time that is very much like the way I grew up. We didn't have the internet back then, so the only way you could find out anything was to look it up in a book or ask someone in person. Explicit romance books were great when it came to describing the physical actions of sex, but not so great on the realistic details. Part of the problem with learning about sex from such things is that you don't know enough to know what questions to ask when you do find someone that you're comfortable enough to talk to about it. Until you actually start experiencing physical intimacy, you don't realize just how much you don't know. That's what I want to explore with Lucy and her relationship with Natsu. That being the case, this story isn't going to be for everyone's taste. Just keep that in mind if you continue reading, okay?

On a personal note, I've spoken on Tumblr about how I have an internet stalker. I'm not going to go into any details about it, but he isn't doing anything illegal or truly harrassing. He just makes me very self-conscious and uncomfortable. That makes writing this story, much less posting it, very difficult for me. I identify very strongly with Lucy and writing a story like this, it's obviously going to be based on my own experiences. Things that actually happened, things that I wish would have happened, and things that I still wish to experience at some point in the future, although I'm not going to explain which is which, of course. Posting something that has so much of myself in it, knowing that he is going to read and react to it, is very difficult for me. My cousin pointed out that I was allowing him to control me, dictate what I did or didn't do, and, in the process, was giving up something that meant a lot to me. Posting your work for others to see requires courage but posting this kind of thing under these circumstances requires a type of courage that I'm not sure I have enough of. That being the case, updates are probably going to be VERY sporadic. My goal is to post a chapter a week, but I'll be honest and say that's unlikely to actually happen. Still, even if the updates are infrequent, I plan on continuing this story. I refuse to let fear control me and I'm not going to start now.

Now, thank you for reading my story and please please please review. It motivates me to continue and sometimes I really need the motivation. Oh, and feel free to guess who's broken into Lucy's apartment this time. I'm curious to see if anyone can figure it out.


	2. Chapter 2

Author's Notes: Well, here's the second chapter. I want to thank everyone for the encouragement and support you've given me for the guy who's been stalking me. Like I said, he's not doing anything really illegal, just "monitoring" I think they call it, but I can't help but feel uncomfortable about it. Still, I'm going to continue writing anyway. Again, thank you for the support. It really means a lot.

This is probably the longest thing I've ever written, nine pages in Word, without notes. It has a few of my own, personal head cannons in it, as well as a completely made up back story for Lucy's unexpected visitor. Feel free to agree or disagree with my head cannons, along with my thoughts and feelings about sex, as portrayed in the story. I like hearing other people's opinions, even when they disagree. Now, on to the fun!

Chapter 2

Startled, Lucy shrieked and leaped to her feet, knocking her chair over backwards. She tried to whirl around to face the intruder, but tripped over the legs of the fallen chair halfway through her turn. Catching herself on the desk before she fell, she was able to get a glimpse of her uninvited guest and realized that she wasn't in any danger. Well, her breasts might be. This particular guest had a disturbing habit of squeezing them whenever she could.

"Cana! You scared me! What are you doing here?"

Cana was sitting on the couch and snickering, amused at Lucy's reaction to her presence. With her question, however, the amusement faded and she adopted an inscrutable look. "That'll take a bit of explaining. Let me get comfortable first, then I'll tell you what's going on."

Lucy watched, more than a little confused by the home invasion, as Cana reached down and grabbed a bag by her feet, pulling out a bottle of wine and setting it on the coffee table in front of her. To Lucy's growing disbelief, the first bottle was followed by three more before Cana paused and looked at the four bottles contemplatively. Pulling out a fifth and evidently final bottle, Cana nodded decisively and looked at Lucy. "Alright." She patted the seat of the couch next to her. "Get over here and get comfortable. I think we have a lot to talk about."

Lucy gave her a dubious look but picked up the fallen chair and set it upright, made her way over to the couch and gingerly sat down, although no where near as close to Cana as she had indicated. Lucy frowned when Cana opened one of the wine bottles and took a long drink from it, not liking the implications of the other four bottles arranged before them.

Noticing her disapproval, Cana simply stated, "Sorry, but I need fortification for this conversation."

That statement just confused Lucy all over again. "Cana, what exactly do you expect us to be talking about? Why are you here? What's going on?"

Cana sighed and drank deeply from the bottle again before twisting her body slightly on the couch, so that she was facing Lucy a little more directly. "Okay, so why I'm here. Earlier today, Gajeel and Natsu were evidently taunting each other from across the guild hall and no one else could hear them. They managed to piss one another off and started fighting, shouting at each other while they fought instead of speaking quietly, so then everybody heard what they said. Some of the things they said set off some alarm bells in quite a few heads, so they were separated and Gajeel questioned about what he knew. After talking to him, Natsu was confronted and answers were demanded. We didn't like the answers we got, so, here I am."

Lucy blinked at her, totally lost. "Um, that doesn't really explain anything. I still don't know what's going on."

To her consternation, Cana had already finished off her first bottle of wine and Lucy watched with growing dismay as she grabbed a second one off of the coffee table. Cana drank a lot, but she didn't usually inhale her alcohol quite that quickly. Opening the bottle, she drank a comparatively small amount before smirking at the blonde mage. "Sex, Lucy. I'm here to talk about sex."

Lucy's mouth dropped open and she stared at her friend in shock. "WHAT?" she shrieked. "What do you mean, you're here to talk about, about that? What on earth did those two idiots say to make you think it was necessary for you to come talk to me about ANYTHING going on between me and Natsu, much less that? You're my friends and I love you guys, Cana, but the guild needs to butt out!"

When Lucy paused to take a breath, the card mage interjected, "Natsu sent me, Lucy. He asked me to come."

Lucy froze, taken off guard by that statement. That was probably the only thing that Cana could have said that would have distracted her from her annoyance and frustration at their guild's interference, which was probably exactly why Cana had said it. Taking a deep breath to calm herself, Lucy spoke again, but much more quietly. "I'm so confused. Why would he do that? What exactly did he say?"

"Well, between him and Gajeel, it came out that the two of you weren't having sex. Of any kind." Cana smirked and started snickering as Lucy turned red. "You should have seen it. Everyone, and I mean everyone, assumed that it was because Natsu didn't know what the hell he was doing and made it awkward or uncomfortable for you. Practically the whole guild was yelling at him for not treating you right, maybe even hurting you."

Lucy looked at her in dismay. "But, Cana, that's not true! Natsu's not doing anything wrong. I'm the reason nothing has been happening between us."

Cana nodded. "Yeah, he told us." Giving her friend an almost wistful look, she added, "That's what made him crack and start talking, you know. He can't stand the idea of you being hurt, especially by him."

Lucy bit her lip and looked away, unable to meet her friend's gaze. Cana smiled fondly at her and said, "He's changed so much since he met you, Lucy. In a good way. You have been such a positive influence in his life. You've influenced a lot of lives in the guild, actually, including mine, of course, with the whole thing with my father. I know you find it annoying when we interfere like this, but we only do it because we love you."

Lucy hesitantly looked back at her and gave her a small smile. "I know and you guys are my family. I'd do anything for any you. It's just embarrassing, especially when it's something that should be private, like this. Now, you still haven't told me what Natsu said."

The brunette drank some more wine before answering. "Short version is that something about physical intimacy scares you and you can't seem to get past that fear. I don't think he believes that you fear **him** , really, but he's not entirely confident of that. He didn't say so, but I think that the very idea of that terrifies him. That something about him is the problem. He wouldn't give us any real details but we'd heard enough to decide that someone needed to sit down and talk to you about what was going on, someone female, that might be able to help you get past whatever is bothering you so much. We were debating who should go when Natsu said it should be me. He said that I was the one who had the best chance of helping you figure things out."

Lucy looked at her thoughtfully. Cana wouldn't necessarily be her first choice for a discussion like this. She was too loud and obnoxious, particularly when the subject of sex came up, and she liked to gossip, too, so there must be something going on that Lucy still didn't understand for Natsu to have suggested that she be the one to come. "Cana? No offense, but why you? Why did he think that, out of everyone in the guild, you'd be the best person to help me with this?"

Cana sighed and focused her gaze on the wine bottle she was holding. "Lucy, there are still a lot of things that you don't know about me." Lucy was started to see that Cana was on the verge of tears as she clutched the wine to her chest, almost cradling it. "I...I was engaged. Before you came to the guild. I was only 17 but I was madly in love with him and we were so happy together. Then, he...well, he died. Just a few months before you joined us. Natsu asked me to come because, other than Bisca, I'm the only female in the guild who's been in a long-term, successful, loving relationship. And Bisca's too reserved to be able to openly discuss something like her sex life with you. The fact that you'd have to face Alzack after that conversation would make things even more difficult." A shadow of her usual grin crossed her face. "Be fun to watch, though. Anyway, with me, you get the knowledge and experience of someone who doesn't have a problem talking about sex and no embarrassing encounters afterward. Natsu knew about my past, since he was part of the guild when it happened, and that's why he suggested me. For someone so dense, he can be pretty sharp. Particularly when it comes to you." She fell silent for a moment, regarding the bottles lined up in front of her and ignoring Lucy's sympathetic gaze.

After a few minutes of silence, Lucy scooted across the couch cushions until she was right next to Cana and plucked the wine bottle from the brunette's unresisting arms. Seeing that the bottle was already half empty, Lucy shook her head sadly, placed it on the coffee table next to the others, and pulled Cana into a hug. The hug was returned and the two women held one another for a short time before Cana pulled away.

Lucy let her pull back but took her hands in her own, not allowing Cana to reach for the wine again. "Cana, you don't have to do this," she said earnestly. "It's obviously painful for you and it's not necessary for you to put yourself through this. I'll figure things out on my own. Well, Natsu and I will. Eventually."

Cana hadn't fought Lucy's grip on her hands, but she'd been longingly eying the nearest bottle until Lucy spoke. She turned back to her with a frown. "Lucy, remembering the good times isn't a hardship. It's the reminder that he's gone, that I'll never experience things like that with him again, that's what hurts. I want to help you, or I wouldn't be here. It's not like I didn't know that I was going to have to take a trip down memory lane." Shaking off her melancholy, she straightened up in her seat and gave Lucy a piercing look. "Two of my friends are apparently hurting and I didn't notice. No one did. I'm not being a very good friend if I can't tell you're having issues with something so important, especially with how often I've teased the two of you about it." She grinned at Lucy teasingly, "I mean, come on, this is Natsu we're talking about. If the two of you were getting it on, he'd have been hauling your cute butt home or, at least into the nearest storage room, on a frequent basis."

Lucy felt her cheeks redden and squirmed in embarrassment. She hated to admit it, but that was actually something that Natsu would be likely to do, assuming that there was nothing holding them back any longer. It wouldn't matter how much it might embarrass her for their guildmates to know the reason for an abrupt departure like that, either. Natsu wouldn't care and he'd probably at least try to convince her to go off with him. Cana snickered, obviously amused by her reaction.

Smirking at her, she said, "So? Tell your big sister Cana all about it. What's really going on with you two?"

Lucy bit her lip, staring down at their joined hands. She really didn't want to discuss what had happened, or not happened, between her and Natsu, but Cana was willing to face some very painful memories to try to help her and, from what she'd said, Natsu was a lot more concerned about what was bothering Lucy than he'd let on. Lucy could understand why he hadn't said anything, though, because he was probably worried that if he did, she'd take it the wrong way. It would have been very easy for her to assume that he was just losing patience with her. The situation was complicated enough and they didn't need a misunderstanding to compound it. Raising her head to look her friend in the eye, she took a deep breath and nodded.

Opening her mouth to answer Cana's question, she suddenly realized that she still had the same problem she'd had when she tried to talk to Natsu about the situation. She had no idea what was really bothering her. She just knew that she felt uneasy whenever they tried anything. Closing her mouth, she realized that she didn't even know where to start and gave Cana a pleading look, hoping she could at least give her a starting point.

Cana sighed gustily, looking down at their hands and tugging lightly, testing Lucy's grip on her. When Lucy's fingers actually tightened on her, she frowned and looked back up at Lucy's face. "Yeah, Natsu said that you weren't really able to talk about it. I think that's a large part of why he's afraid the problem that you're having is with him."

"But it's not!" Lucy protested immediately. "I don't **know** what the problem is! He goes to touch me and I get uneasy and upset and maybe even a little scared, so he immediately pulls away, but I really want him to touch me. I don't understand why I feel like that when he's just doing something that I really, really want. It's so frustrating and it's only getting worse!"

Somewhat startled by Lucy's outburst, Cana ceased her subtle efforts to free her hands and focused her full attention on her unhappy friend. "Alright, I get it. That's why I'm here, after all." She gave the blonde a searching look. "Lucy, if you really want help with this, you're going to have to be pretty honest with me, even if it makes you uncomfortable. Are you willing to do that?"

Lucy bit her lip and thought for a moment before nodding hesitantly. "You and Natsu both seem to think that you can help me figure this out and I'm not getting anywhere by myself, so I'm willing to try it."

Cana nodded, her eyes lighting up with anticipation. "Okay, then let's get into the good stuff. Since you can't tell me what's upsetting you, let's back it up. How close have the two of you gotten to having sex? What have you done so far?"

Lucy blushed and looked down to where she was still holding Cana's hands captive. She really didn't want to discuss such intimate details, but she had agreed to try, so she haltingly described what had happened the one time she and Natsu had almost had sex. When she was finished, she looked up hesitantly, only to find Cana frowning slightly at her in disbelief.

"Do you mean to tell me that you haven't even done any heavy petting yet?" At Lucy's confused expression, she elaborated, "Touching each other's goodies. Maybe even oral sex. You know, where you use your mouth down there. Or he does."

Lucy, blushing heavily, shook her head, still reluctant to look at Cana while she spoke. "No, nothing like that. I think that was his intention when Happy interrupted us, but we didn't actually get that far. All we've really done since then is kiss. Every time we try to go any further, we end up stopping."

Cana sighed and abruptly yanked her hands out of Lucy's grasp. "Sorry, but I really need a drink."

Lucy frowned in disapproval but didn't say anything as she watched the card mage snatch up the half-empty bottle of wine and down the majority of it in one go. Sighing, Cana settled back against the couch and looked at Lucy. "Lucy, why are you in such a hurry to have sex? Why are you rushing things?"

Lucy frowned at her, confused again. "I don't understand what you mean. We've only been a couple for a few months but we've been partners for years. He's seen me naked more times than I can count and I'd even seen him naked a few times before. Pretty much everyone expected us to start having sex as soon as we got together. Exactly how are we rushing things?"

Cana sighed and finished off the bottle in her hands before answering her. "Look, sex is supposed to be enjoyable. It's one of those things where you're supposed to enjoy the journey, too, not just haul ass to the final destination. You're both virgins and you're so shy about such things, it would make sense for you to take your time about it, regardless of what anyone else expects." She smirked at Lucy. "You aren't planning on making a sex tape or something and selling it off to pay your rent, are you?"

Lucy stared at her, shocked that Cana would say something like that, even teasingly. "Of course not! You know me better than that!"

Cana shrugged and replaced her empty wine bottle with a full one, although she didn't open it yet. "Well, I thought I did, but this impatience of yours to get laid makes me wonder. If that's not it, then something else is going on, but I don't know what it is. What are you not telling me? Why are you so focused on the two of you having sex when you obviously aren't ready for that step?"

Lucy wasn't sure how to respond to that question. She thought she was ready, but Natsu didn't seem to agree and Cana definitely didn't. She had a feeling that if Cana knew about Natsu's instincts and the whole claiming bit, then she might think that Lucy was feeling pressured into having sex, but she didn't feel that way at all. She actually wanted to be with Natsu, very badly, but something was holding her back. She couldn't seem to figure out what it was, either, and that's what was frustrating her so badly. She did want to tell the brunette about just how significant sex would be for the couple, but Cana was a notorious gossip and she didn't want the whole guild knowing about their wedding plans just yet. On the other hand, Cana was already suspicious and she wasn't the type to let something like this go. Especially if it was making her friends unhappy.

After thinking for a moment, she looked at Cana with a determined expression on her face. "I really don't think that I'm rushing into anything, but there is something about the situation that you don't know. I don't want the whole guild knowing about it, though, so you have to promise not to tell anyone, and I mean anyone, before I'll tell you."

Cana blinked at her, surprised. After a moment's thought, giving the blonde a calculating look, she responded, "Maid of honor."

Lucy's jaw dropped. "What?!"

Cana snickered at her expression. "Either this is a really big deal or you're being a drama queen and you aren't usually that much of a drama queen. So, I want something in exchange for sitting on something so juicy. Maid of honor. Not Levy or Erza or Juvia, me. You can give them some other position. I want to be maid of honor at your wedding. Even if it's not Natsu you end up marrying, I still want to be your maid of honor."

Lucy was torn between exasperation at a her audacity and being flattered that it seemed to mean so much to her. She really hadn't expected Cana to demand something in exchange for her silence, but, thinking about it, she supposed that she should have known better. She knew that her female guildmates would be clamoring for the role of maid of honor as soon as the engagement was announced and she wasn't looking forward to that headache. If Cana was actually able to help her overcome her intimacy issues, then she would certainly deserve some sort of reward. It didn't hurt that already having chosen a maid of honor, especially with a valid, understandable reason for the choice, would stop the fighting before it could really start.

"Agreed, but only if you agree to give up any claim on anything else. Like being named the guardian of any children we might have if anything were to happen to me and Natsu."

The counter-proposal gave Cana pause but it didn't take the brunette long to decide that Lucy's conditions were acceptable. "I agree, but only if we keep it open for future negotiations. Just in case. Besides, that was very interesting, that certainty just now when you named Natsu as the father of any children you might have."

Lucy took a deep breath. "Alright. That's acceptable. Now, how much do you know about dragons and their mating habits? And how that affects the dragon slayers?"

Cana blinked, slightly startled by the abrupt change in subject. She had opened up her third wine bottle when Lucy wasn't looking and took a swig from it before she answered. "Not a lot. I've never been interested in Natsu that way, or any of the other slayers, for that matter, so it didn't matter to me. What about it?"

Lucy nodded, half expecting that response, and launched into a long explanation about what Natsu had told her the day they got together. At the end of it, Cana was more than a little surprised. "Are you seriously telling me that sex is marriage as far as Natsu is concerned?"

Lucy shook her head. "Not really. Married people can leave one another and get divorced. This is more permanent than that. Once we take that step, there's no going back."

Cana frowned at her. "Does that mean there isn't going to be a wedding then?"

Lucy laughed, shaking her head, and blushed slightly. "I was concerned about that, too. That's actually what that major fight we had a few months ago was about. When we worked it out, Natsu told me that I wasn't raised by a dragon, so he doesn't expect me to follow their customs. He wants us to have a wedding, actually."

Cana though for a moment and then gave her a shrewd look. "Vows. You're a celestial spirit mage, so you always keep your promises. If you have a wedding, then neither one of you can leave."

Lucy was somewhat surprised by Cana's insight, but she nodded in agreement. "Yes. I told him that I wanted to wait until six months after we first got together before he could propose to me and we could get engaged. He agreed, reluctantly, but there's no reason to wait that long before we, well, you know."

Cana scowled and then looked at the bottle she was holding. "Well, this conversation is a lot less about actual sex than I expected." Shaking her head, she set the bottle back down on the coffee table and then focused her full attention on the blonde. "Lucy, not having a reason to wait doesn't mean you should push for something that you aren't ready for. Particularly when it has those kinds of consequences. Natsu's willing to wait, despite what you said about his instincts pushing him. Is that why you're in such a rush? Because the delay is making things difficult for him? Or is his possessiveness making things difficult for you? I know that was an issue to begin with. How would having sex affect that part of things, anyway?"

Lucy huffed at her, exasperated. "Why do you keep saying I'm rushing things? What makes you so sure I'm not ready to be with him like that? And we're dealing with his possessiveness. Natsu, as a man, isn't all that possessive. He trusts me, after all, so he knows I'm not going to betray him in any way. He also knows that I'm not going to leave him for someone else, which is what his dragon side seems to fear. Once we've, um, been intimate, he's pretty sure those instincts will calm down. This isn't the human kind of possessiveness, it's a dragon's, and I'm not a princess in a tower, after all, I'm the dragon's mate. His instincts see me more as another dragon, not a treasure that he owns. He'll still be protective, of course, because that's just the way he is, but the claiming is mutual, so with my claim on him in addition to his claim on me, the possessiveness should fade."

Cana nodded. "So, what does this claim consist of? Are you going to bite one another or something? Maybe leave some kind of magical tattoo on each other?"

Lucy snorted at her. "No, nothing like that. It's just, well, having sex. He says it affects our scents. It doesn't actually change the base scent, but adds something to it. He says it's really hard to explain to someone without a sensitive enough nose, kind of like trying to describe a particular color to someone who's color blind and can't see it. He said that biting is actually a human way of marking someone, because it's visible. With dragon scales, the only way to leave a mark when biting would be to cause enough damage to scar, even with the scales, and some dragons don't really have visible hides, like Atlas Flame didn't. Either way, that's not something dragons want to do to their mates." Lucy blushed and looked around the room, avoiding Cana's gaze. "He, um, he said that if he uses his teeth on me, it will be because it's something he likes and wants to do and that I might enjoy, not because his dragon instincts are influencing him."

Cana snickered at her. "Oh, I would have loved to witnessed that particular conversation."

Lucy pouted at her in response. "Stop teasing, Cana. This is difficult enough to talk about without you laughing at me. And don't think I didn't notice that you never answered my questions. Why do you think I'm rushing things?"

Cana snorted at her. "Because you are. If you were comfortable with where the two of you are at and what you're doing, then you wouldn't keep pushing him away. At least you guys are able to actually discuss things. Being able to ask each other questions and speak openly about how you're feeling and what you want makes things a LOT easier. Now, Lucy, I have another question."

Feeling slightly apprehensive that Cana was actually asking permission, Lucy nodded, so Cana continued, "I know you've read some of Erza's books with sex in them, but do you have any other sources of information about sex? I mean, those books are fantasies, so do you have any knowledge about how things work in the real world?"

Lucy gave her a confused look. "Well, my mother died when I was young and the girls in the guild that I might be willing to talk about such things with are also virgins, like I thought you were, so not really. What do you mean, 'how things work in the real world'?"

Cana sighed and picked up her bottle of wine again, taking a long drink. "Lucy, those books are sexual fantasies. They rarely talk about the realities of sex, because that would disrupt the fantasy. Sex can be awkward and funny and embarrassing. Your bodies can make strange noises and things don't always work out like you plan. You can be trying to pull off a move that you've read about that sounds hot and sexy and just end up feeling ridiculous and getting laughed at. He can cum too soon or take longer than you expected or your body might not produce enough lubrication, making it uncomfortable for you, and it's rare that the two of you actually climax together. Sex is noisy and messy and even smelly and those stories rarely talk about such things."

Lucy frowned at her. "If all of that is true, then why even do it?"

Cana laughed. "Because it can feel absolutely amazing, especially with the right guy. The books are all about the positives and I'm just telling you that there are also some negatives to go along with them. Believe me, it can really be worth it, but if you're expecting an absolutely perfect experience, like the books tend to describe, then you're probably going to be disappointed. Especially the first time. They also tend to have couples go straight from kissing for the first time to having full-on sex, which is also unrealistic. That's fine in a fantasy, but not near as much fun in reality."

Lucy gave her a thoughtful look. "So, what do you suggest we do, then?"

"Play, Lucy. Explore. Experiment. Natsu may not have read those books but he's probably heard more discussions and overheard more actual sex than all the books you've ever read combined. Virgin or not, he probably has a hell of a lot better idea of the realities of sex than you do. Let him guide you. Now that I think about it, have you even touched him yet? At all?"

Lucy blushed and shook her head. "I want to and he's more than willing to let me but I'm not sure what to do. I don't know how."

It was Cana's turn to be exasperated. "Lucy, you aren't going to figure it out unless you try something. Anything. That's what I meant by exploring and experimenting. He's completely inexperienced so he probably doesn't know a lot about what he likes, either. I'm sure he has some ideas of things you can test out, but neither one of you will figure anything out unless you start trying things. And I'm not talking about going all the way, I'm talking about exploring each other's bodies with your hands and mouths."

Lucy bit her lip but, after a moment's though, she nodded. "I guess we can try that. Cana, do you have any idea of why I keep tensing up when he goes to try something, though? If I'm still doing that, then he won't be willing to try anything anyway."

Cana took a long drink from the wine bottle and then gave her a thoughtful look. "If I had to guess, I'd say it was a control issue."

Lucy frowned, confused. "Control?"

Cana nodded. "That one time you almost did it, he made you feel things that you hadn't felt before and it scared you. Your body was doing things, reacting in ways you didn't expect, and you didn't know how to handle it. It can be really disconcerting to realize just how much power someone else can have over you in a situation like that. Frankly, I think it would do you a lot of good to focus on him the next time you try anything. Natsu's not the type to hide his feelings and I think maybe seeing him react to you just as strongly as you react to him might be reassuring for you."

Lucy had never thought that the issue might be something like that, but she decided that it was a better explanation than anything she'd been able to come up with, so it couldn't hurt to try it. She nodded in response.

"Oh, and another thing. Lucy, one of the keys to good sex is being able to trust your partner and just let go. I doubt trusting Natsu will be an issue for you, but letting go might be. You have a tendency to over-analyze things sometimes and if you get too caught up in thinking about every little thing that's happening, it makes it difficult to just relax and enjoy the experience."

Lucy wasn't really sure what Cana was talking about, but she nodded anyway. "Okay. I'll try to keep that in mind."

Cana snorted and rolled her eyes. "Never mind. I'll warn Natsu and let him take care of it."

Lucy gave her a dubious look, not sure she liked the implications of that statement. "Um, okay, I guess. Do you have any other suggestions for me? Could you maybe go into a little more detail about the "negatives" that you mentioned?"

Cana snickered and shook her head. "Oh, no. That wouldn't be any fun. That's not your real problem anyway, so you can discover that stuff on your own. Well, with Natsu's help, of course."

She finished off the bottle of wine she was holding and stood up, snickering again at Lucy's annoyed expression. "Well, I think that's really all we need to talk about. Maybe I'll come visit again, after you have a bit more experience under your belt. Oh, and you might want to talk to Levy. She's in the same boat you are when it comes to knowledge about sex and she's probably going to be dealing with a dragon slayer's unique issues, too." She set the empty bottle of wine back down on the small table and grabbed the two unopened bottles, placing them back in her bag.

Lucy nodded, having already decided to talk to Levy soon, and stood up, giving Cana a hug. "Thank you, Cana. I won't really know how helpful your advice has been until we try it out, but thank you for trying and for being willing to face some unhappy memories to do so."

Cana hugged her back. "You're my friend, Lucy, and that's what friends do. You coming back to the guild with me?"

Lucy stepped back and shook her head. "No, it's still my day to stay at home. I'm going to think about what you said and maybe do some writing on my book."

Cana nodded and headed towards the door. "Alright. If Natsu's still at the guild, I'll let him know. I'll see you later and, the next time I see you, maybe you'll have done more than just eat him up with your eyes."

She left, laughing at Lucy's reaction to her final statement. Lucy locked the door behind her and then turned to lean back against the door. "Explore and experiment, huh? Well, I guess we can do that."

tbc...

Well, I hope you enjoyed that. Please review! I'd love to hear what people think and it encourages me to keep writing. Thank you for reading!


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